Leaving it till the last week of August to do a post. I had the intention of doing it last week, but I just couldn't find the energy of thought to write anything out.
There isn't much to write about anyways, life has been pretty stagnant recently. I been getting the feeling of needing to do something different, something for myself, and get a grip to move on in life. The thought is there, but the motivation isn't.
It has also been increasingly difficult to put my personal thoughts and feelings into words. Maybe it is because there really nothing to write about. My life, It's boring, predictable and unhappening. I guess an uneventful time is a calm one.
But there are still much to complain about.
I keeping finding excuses, for both myself and others.
Excuses to just answer my thoughts momentarily.
Excuses to just explain the circumstance and happenings.
Excuses to just please myself, and not do anything about it.
I keep telling myself excuses.
They're throwing tantrums, because they're stressed out about school. It's alright.
They're being mean and moody, because it is their final year at school. It's crazy and hectic. I've been there too, I should understand that better than anyone else.
They're lashing out at others, because stepping out into society is scary and pretty harsh. It's normal to be afraid.
They're being self-centered and uncaring, because... ... what?
I'm tired of finding excuses for a behaviour to pacify myself, that hey, it's okay, it's reasonable, just deal with it and get over it. It's tiring to cope with the excuses that I find, they are just there for me to feel like there is a reason for everything that is happening and that I should just live with it. There are only that many excuses one can find before reaching a bursting point.
I want to excuse myself from life.
