Another Christmas eve. I've realized, as you get older, the spirit of Christmas dies with you. What happen to those child like Christmas songs we used to sing? The Christmas trees and the colorfully wrapped presents underneath it? Santa will give out his presents tonight to the children on the nice list. Dear Santa, instead of giving presents could you give me answers?
A year is coming to an end, and a new start is arriving.
But I have no idea what the new year brings, what my resolutions are and I have no plans.
A part of the learning path has been covered, finished and put aside.
All is left is the determining results which can both crush and liven your dreams.
A step out to the world has been taken, a step that can never be forgotten.
But it is just one step, no more no, less, and I have no courage to take another.
A route for the near future days have been made, and there is no use regretting.
But is the route what I really want? Is it worth taking? Or is it one that I will regret from the start?
So many questions, so many new experiences, so many confused and clueless emotions within me. Am I already working for the future? Am I already part of my future, or is it just the future of yesterdays? What am I supposed to do or be in my future? Is it really up to me to decide, or there is really no such thing as choosing your future?
There is one thing for sure, working is definitely going to be both part of the present and in the future. Whether is it to earn a living, for the experience or having no choice to, it has to be done. So I've started trying it out, I've started working part time. My first time in the outside world, my first time earning my own money. Well, there is a first time for everything, and first times are not always pleasant.
The working life seems like a mundane and boring one. You wake up early, do a morning routine, get to the workplace, and do the tasks given to you. Then, the most interesting thing of the day will happen, Lunch Break! After which, you carry on with your work, bid goodbye and return home. So many usual happenings, so many routines repeating day after day, that it gets boring and you lose the meaning of fun, smiles and even the meaning of life itself. There are no longer smiles on the faces of the people, no eagerness to start a new day of work. The unhappy souls I meet on the public transport dampens my mood on my way to work, Try to be cheerful, I smile, only to get glares and numerous 'are you crazy' looks of the other commuters.
So this is really part of the future, part of the unhappiness you cannot escape from. You have to be part of it, before you can be accepted as a part of the society, as part of the future.
There is one thing for sure, working is definitely going to be both part of the present and in the future. Whether is it to earn a living, for the experience or having no choice to, it has to be done. So I've started trying it out, I've started working part time. My first time in the outside world, my first time earning my own money. Well, there is a first time for everything, and first times are not always pleasant.
The working life seems like a mundane and boring one. You wake up early, do a morning routine, get to the workplace, and do the tasks given to you. Then, the most interesting thing of the day will happen, Lunch Break! After which, you carry on with your work, bid goodbye and return home. So many usual happenings, so many routines repeating day after day, that it gets boring and you lose the meaning of fun, smiles and even the meaning of life itself. There are no longer smiles on the faces of the people, no eagerness to start a new day of work. The unhappy souls I meet on the public transport dampens my mood on my way to work, Try to be cheerful, I smile, only to get glares and numerous 'are you crazy' looks of the other commuters.
So this is really part of the future, part of the unhappiness you cannot escape from. You have to be part of it, before you can be accepted as a part of the society, as part of the future.
